


never fallen from quite this high

by dryadfiona



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, F/M, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2020-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:47:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27410680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dryadfiona/pseuds/dryadfiona
Summary: Lucifer hates weddings.
Relationships: Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar
Comments: 14
Kudos: 93





	never fallen from quite this high

It's not that Lucifer isn't happy for his sister. Azrael's clearly having a wonderful time, and only talked his ear off about the more gruesome details of her profession for about twenty minutes. The woman she's marrying is almost as bright and bubbly as her best friend, Ella, and Lucifer had been _convinced_ there was something there, but apparently Amenadiel was right. Wonders never cease.

The bar is open, which is nice, and the crowd's full of attractive singles, which would normally be a good night for him. Unfortunately, while his father couldn't make it, his mother had flown in for the event.

"Lucifer," she calls from somewhere, and Lucifer finishes his drink before he heads over. The bartender makes a sympathetic face. 

"Yes, Mother?" he says. She's tall and imposing, especially in the presumably-impractical stilettos she's taken to favoring whenever she visits LA. 

"I was just talking to this _fascinating_ young man," she says, and Lucifer shouldn't be surprised.

As much as he tries to tell his family he does _not_ need help meeting women or meeting men or meeting anyone else, for that matter, they seem convinced his bachelor lifestyle isn't by choice. It's not as though he'd want to settle down; Lux is enough for him. He'd tried the relationship thing, even, with Eve, though they'd disapproved of her. It's just not for him.

Still, the other man doesn't know that, so he makes polite conversation with Raj until he sees an escape--Ella waving him over. He bids the man his goodbyes and pushes his way through the crowd.

Ella's more Azrael's friend than his, it's true, but she's still one of the few outside his family he'd rely on. (For that matter, one of the few even including them.) It's hard not to like the forensic scientist, cheerful and kind, and willing to party with Lucifer and discuss mortuary science with Azrael and even dance with Maze. 

"Miss Lopez," he says.

"Oh, shut up with that proper stuff, just because you went to school in England doesn't mean you need to be, like--formal all the time." 

"Fine," he says. "What did you want?"

"Settle an argument for me," Ella says, and there's a mischievous grin on her face that he recognizes from his visits back home. Usually it would precede some prank, which would give it away so that Lucifer could avoid it, unless it was targeted at any of his other siblings, in which case he resigned himself to taking the fall. 

"You're sweet," Ella had said the first time he did that. Lucifer had been just about ready to drop out of high school and make his own way, spent most of his nights busy with strangers, and had shot her a disbelieving look. "No, really! Only someone sweet would help us with that."

"I just wanted the credit for dying Uriel's hair," he'd said. It's not _technically_ a lie.

"Psh, yeah, right," Ella had said, surprisingly insightful for someone six years younger than him. "Anyway, so back to Geordi--"

"What argument?" Lucifer says rather than get caught up in another discussion.

"So," Ella says. "Do you think those dating shows-- _The Bachelor, America's Most Eligible_ , all that jazz--are they real or fake?"

"Staged," Lucifer says immediately.

"Thank you," says the woman sitting next to Ella. Lucifer hadn't really looked at her, but she's pretty--long blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, wearing a relatively conservative dress that Lucifer still lets his eyes linger on.

"What? No!" Ella says. "You can't fake chemistry, it's totally real."

"You can absolutely fake chemistry," Lucifer says. "Or need I remind you of--"

"Ugh, don't," Ella says. "No one needs to know about my embarrassing high school days, okay, it's bad enough that you do."

"Fine, then take it from me," says the woman. "I hated my co-star when I was acting. Like, loathed the guy."

"You're an actress?" Lucifer asks.

The woman shakes her head. "Not anymore. Chloe, by the way."

"Lucifer," he says. Chloe only looks a little surprised at that, and Lucifer raises his expectations for her in response. "What do you do, then?"

"I'm a homicide detective," Chloe says. "Just transferred to Ella's precinct."

"She's my date!" Ella says. "I mean. Not date-date. Just didn't want to show up alone, you know? Azrael would have hounded me about it."

"I understand the feeling," Lucifer mutters.

"Ugh, is your mom bugging you again?" Ella asks.

"Who's your mom?" Chloe asks. Lucifer points over to where his mom is flirting with the man he'd abandoned, who doesn't seem to be half as interested as he was in Lucifer. A nice little ego boost there. "Oh."

"I know, she looks so young," Lucifer says. "It's the plastic surgery."

Chloe snorts. "Kind of like my mom." At Lucifer's questioning look, she adds, "Penelope Decker."

"Penelope Decker!" he says, delighted. "Oh, you have to introduce me."

Chloe shoots him an awkward look. "Uh. We just met."

"What, you're not taken in with me already?" he says.

Chloe's face stays mildly irritated. "Not really."

"You dick, this is my friend," Ella says. "Stop acting so arrogant."

"It's not arrogance if it's backed up," Lucifer says.

"Yeah, but still," Ella says. "Come on, be the guy who let me talk about protractors for way too long."

"Protractors?" Chloe mouths at him, and Lucifer can't help but grin.

"Oh," Ella says in an utterly unconvincing tone. "I think Azrael wants my attention."

Lucifer's fairly certain Azrael's interrogating her new bride about her opinions regarding whatever her latest hyperfixation is, but Ella's already gone.

"Look," Chloe says. "I'm pretty sure Ella's just trying to set me up. You can go, I won't be annoyed."

"What? No, she's clearly trying to set me up," Lucifer says. "Not that I need it."

"Sure," Chloe says. "Although. Hm. Wait a second."

"You've decided you enjoy the pleasure of my company," he says, more to annoy her than to really flirt, he thinks. 

Sure enough, Chloe glares at him again, though one of the corners of her mouth is quirked up. "No. If your mom's trying to set you up, and Ella's trying to set me up, we could just hang out together for the rest of the evening."

"What, give in? That defeats the purpose of avoiding it," Lucifer says.

"Or," Chloe says. "We get to just relax without trying to force a relationship where neither of us are looking for one."

Lucifer has to admit, it does sound appealing. His mother will ask him all about Chloe later, and Lucifer can delight in making it clear he has no real interest either way. It might be enough to make her back off. It might be enough to make _Ella_ back off.

"Well, I suppose you're not the worst conversationalist," Lucifer says, and Chloe laughs.

(It's much, much later, when Lucifer realizes he really enjoyed hearing that laugh from the very beginning, that he realizes how monumentally screwed he is.)

**Author's Note:**

> snippet of a romcom au i'll probably never finish but wanted to get this scene out for

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [what do you truly desire?](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27804481) by [dryadfiona](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dryadfiona/pseuds/dryadfiona)




End file.
